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Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jameson
"Fuck," she gasped, straining for me, her hand pumping my cock like a piston.
"Keep doing that," I gritted. "No, don't keep doing that, I need to the inside of you, now."
Of all the things I ever thought I needed, I never knew for sure until now. Nothing else mattered except sliding inside of her, feeling that scalding hot softness as I began to move, watching her the whites of her eyes glowed in the moonlight as her eyes went wide, and she threw her head back, exposing the milky white of her throat. She gasped in a low, grunting sound as I sank into her as deep as I possibly could.
"Jesus," I swore. That night at the casino... she'd felt amazing there. But like this? With her spread out below me, so I could see her, touch her, bend my lips to her neck as I fucked her? "Oh my God, Charlie...?" I didn't finish my question. I wasn't even sure what it was I was asking. How am I supposed to leave here tomorrow? How am I supposed to let you go? How am my supposed to walk away from this - whatever it is -before it even begins?
There were too many questions, and they all jammed together in my brain so the only sound that came out of my mouth was low, confused moan. Helpless, I bent my head and buried my teeth into her neck, drowning out everything except the feel of her underneath me. Her hands clutched, scrabbling at my back, clawing at my hair, yanking my head back. I could feel her starting to fall to pieces. "Yes," I encouraged her, moving faster. "You let go, I've got you," I didn't know if that promise meant anything to her, but a sure as shit meant something to me. "I've got you," I said again, not even sure what I meant. It wasn't like she was falling...
But maybe, maybe I was.
"Jesus," she gasped, arching upward and straining against me. I could feel her legs clenching, thighs quivering against my skin. There was no sound other than startled, gasping breath, a mirror image of the lapping water against the shore.
And then it was like everything was holding its breath, and that all once her noises filled my head, as she came like a freight train, and I loved every second of it. I pushed myself up on my arms, driving into her harder, loving how she was finally, finally breaking free. She was a wild thing underneath me, her eyelids fluttering, her mouth stretched wide open, and I loved the sight of her and I knew that if I took nothing else away from this ill-fated business trip it would be the memory of Charlie Kendall coming in the moonlight.
Too soon afterward I felt my own body start to shudder. "Shit," I said, pulling back, "I'm going to come," I gasped, making to pull away.
But her legs wrapped around me. "I want to feel," she said, gasping. "Oh my God, you're so hard,"
There is not a man in the world who wouldn't lose it when a woman says that to him, and I was no different. Her words sent direct signal down to my cock, and suddenly I was coming, hard and fast, the kind of orgasm that tears out if you and leaves you feeling like you've left your body. No thoughts clouded my brain, only the static overload of everything.
I came, still inside of her, unable to pull away because she felt too damn good.
But when it was over, something came over me, a regret I hadn't realized I had until just now. "Shit," I groaned, sagging against her chest.
She ran her hands up and down my back, light scratching motions with her nails. "I agree," she said, then laughed to herself.
I pulled back up looking at her and I was pretty sure I was smiling like an idiot because she grinned back at me. "What?"
"I have a room," I chuckled, tucking her hair back from her face. "At the B&B. And I had it all worked out. We were going to leave the restaurant and head over there, and I was going to fuck you slowly in a soft, comfortable bed." I shifted and pulled myself out of her, brushing the sand off my elbows. "Not on the ground in the dark." I slid my shirt on and felt around before I found her pants and handed them to her.
She grinned and sat up again, pulling them on and then hugging her knees to her chest. She fell silent for a moment, fiddling with her shirt buttons and I waited, hardly daring to breathe because my gut told me she was getting ready to say something I really wanted to hear.
"Well?" she said slowly, tracing her finger in spirals on the dark, wet sand. "I mean, there is still time for that."
My whole body stiffened along with my cock. "You mean that?" I asked. "You'd stay over?"
She licked her lips and looked at me from under a curtain of lashes. "We don't have much time," she said slowly. "I think we ought to have as much fun as we can while -" her sentence was punctuated with a shriek because I had already thrown her over my shoulder and started sprinting for my car.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Charlie
"People are asleep!" I giggled, gasping as his lips found my neck.
"Don't care," Jameson murmured in my ear. "Need you, right now."
"You promised me a shower and a big soft bed," I complained through my laughter.
"Thought you liked it up against the wall," he growled, pushing me up against it and pressing into me.
The feel of his hardness made me gasp, but I shook my head resolutely. "Where is your room?"
"You're a stubborn one," he complained. "Stop talking now."
His kiss silenced my retort. We stumbled backwards down the darkened hallway of the B&B. My shirt was already half off of me somehow and I think he might have never grabbed his from the beach in the first place. "Room," I chided him as his fingers went to my waistband.
"It's right here," he said, slipping his card into the lock.
I fell back into the room, sending the door slamming into the opposite wall with a resounding bang. I winced, the mom in me forever terrified of loud noises disturbing my baby's sleep. But my baby wasn't here. I was out being reckless and free and wild with a guy who couldn't get enough of me. It was fucking amazing. I felt effervescent, like champagne bubbles were popping in my veins, and everywhere his lips touched made my skin sing. I felt reckless and dangerous doing something like this. Spending the night away from my son...what if he needed me?
"This is taking too long," Jameson growled, sweeping me up into his arms and slamming the door behind him. I shook my head and tried to stuff down the guilt that was threatening to eat away at me and I wrapped my arms around his neck, expecting him to sprint in the direction of the giant white bed the size of an ocean.
But instead he turned and headed into the bathroom.
"What?" I asked. "What are you? Oh!" I clung to him as he bent to turn on the shower, tilting me nearly upside down in the process, but he pulled me back up again with an amused kiss.
"Did you really think I was going to drop you?" he wondered, lowering me gently into the warm spray. "I told you, I've got you."
I licked my lips, feeling warmth that had nothing to do with the shower pool in my belly. "I have to say," I said as he stepped in with me. "Showering was not what I was expecting we'd do first."
"I'm all sandy," he explained, soaping up one of the clothes that were neatly folded on the shelf. "And I don't want to get chafed while I'm fucking you in that bed."
The heat in my belly grew warmer still as he slid the washcloth gently across my breasts. I watched his face as he concentrated, soaping up first one and then the other before sliding it down my belly.
"Ah," I hissed as he slid it between my legs.
"Have to make sure this pretty pussy is clean too," he murmured, rubbing gently. The warmth of water and the friction of the cloth made me sigh and sag into him. "That's right," he whispered in my ear as I let out a moan. "Nice and clean, sweet thing. Do you think you're clean enough down there yet?"
"No," I whined, arching my hips into his hand.
He chuckled and knelt on the floor. The spray of water from the shower ran in rivulets down his skin and I realized I was seeing him naked, clearly, for the first time.
His skin was tanned golden, and the hairs on his arms and chest were a shade lighter. He had a smattering of freckles across his forearms and chest, like a trail of
breadcrumbs leading somewhere. I vowed to kiss each one in turn before this night was over. His eyes were such a light blue in places, the same colors as the hazy summer sky and the crinkles in the corners put me in mind of angel wings. Was I drunk? High? Practical Charlie who got shit done would never think of these sorts of comparisons, but then practical Charlie would be home with her son and not leaning back on the cool tile and letting a man she barely knew kiss his way up her thighs before sucking her clit into his mouth.
"Jesus," I moaned as he nibbled and sucked. "You're a maniac."
"And you're delicious," he retorted, slipping his tongue inside of me. "And a little soapy too."
Something bubbled up inside of me, those champagne bubbles in my veins getting bigger and bigger and suddenly I was laughing and crying and coming all at the same time. Emotions swirled around, getting mixed up in my brain as I scratched my nails down his arms. "Fuck, like that, like that," I panted, unsure if the water on my face was from the shower or my own tears.
When he stood back up again, his face was a mask of desire, but when he peered closer at me, it turned to one of concern. "Hey, you okay?" he asked, cupping my face in his hands.
"I don't know," I babbled, still lost in swirl of emotions. "I mean yes, I'm so fucking good, but I'm also feeling so..."
"Different?"
I nodded.
He looked serious. "Me too."
I tilted my head up to meet his gaze. "What is this?"
He shook his head. "I don't know."
"We barely know each other."
"I mean." His voice dropped. "That's technically true, but I don't think it's really true."
"What does that mean?"
"It means I do know you, Charlie." He grabbed my hand, pressing it to his heart. "Don't you know me?"
It was impossible and it was wild. It made no sense. But he kept saying he trusted his gut. Did I? "I think...," something slipped into place and I looked up at him in wonder. "I think I do."
I saw his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed. He turned and twisted the shower off, and then grabbing a towel, he wrapped it around me, carrying me gently to bed just like a baby before lying down at my side.
"This bed is huge," I murmured sleepily, running my hands across the exquisitely soft sheets. As I stared at the ceiling emotions, I had no name for swirled around in my brain, a storm too big for me to comprehend. I blinked a little, gasping a quiet breath and trying to keep the panic at bay, but the next breath came out as a sob.
"Hey," Jameson said, pushing himself up on his elbows and peering into my face. "What's..." he trailed off, eyes darting back and forth as he read the panic in my face.
"Nothing, I'm okay."
"You're lying to me."
"No, I'm not."
He sat up and grabbed my hand. "Don't you ever lie to me, Charlie. Not about how you're feeling, you understand? Now, what's wrong?"
I opened my mouth, but anger at myself choked me and I couldn't get the words out.
His eyes darted across my face. "It's Malcolm, isn't it?"
"I've never spent the night away from him," I gasped, and suddenly I was crying. "I don't get it," I protested. "I want to. I want to be normal with you and just not care..."
He leaned over and kissed me on the nose. "If you didn't care, then you wouldn't be you."
"I'm sorry," I said, sitting up.
"Don't be."
"I wish I could..."
"Stop." He pressed his finger to my mouth.
"But you were going to fuck me in this big bed," I mumbled around his finger. "And you're all hard..."
"I'm fine," he promised. "I'm always hard for you, Charlie." He chuckled a little and then stood up, stretching, treating me to the sight of his abs in the full blazing light of every lamp in the room and for a moment I wondered if I was a crazy person. But then he smiled that kind smile and the corners of his eyes crinkled as he extended his hand. "Come on," he said, helping me to my feet. "Let's bring you home to your boy."
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Jameson
Her hand trembled as she put the key into the lock, and this time I had no qualms about reaching out to help her steady it. Together, we turned the key, and I saw her wince at the loud noise of it clicking back. I felt like we were sneaking her back home again, like a couple of bad teenagers out past curfew and there was something thrilling about that thought. I kissed the top of her head, brushing my lips down to whisper in her ear. "I like sneaking around with you."
She stifled the laugh behind her hand and then shushed me before pushing the door open. Immediately, she kicked off her shoes, and padded in her sock feet up the stairs.
I followed more slowly, giving her a second to get her bearings so that when I reached the top of the stairs, she had already had Malcolm scooped up into her arms. He peered out at me from underneath the curtain of her curls. "You awake?" I asked him.
He sat up and blinked, jamming a chubby fist into his eyes and rubbing it in the endearing way that toddlers have before he flopped back onto Charlie's shoulder. She grinned and bounced him up and down once. "We got home just in time," she whispered with a smile. "He always wakes up right around two and wants a snack. He's actually nocturnal, you know."
I chuckled under my breath. "What do you usually do when it happens? You know, on nights when you haven't been out gallivanting with your gentleman caller."
She rolled her eyes at me. "I usually pack a little cooler, actually," she said. "My mom calls it his bug-out bag. That way we don't have to make a bunch of noise going downstairs looking for food for him, and he stays sleepy in his crib and falls back asleep that much easier."
"I take it we're not doing that tonight?"
She looked up at me with hope in her eyes. "I was hoping you wouldn't mind?" she said, hugging him tighter. I saw her relief at being with him and it squeezed my heart.
I shook my head. "Not at all," I told her gently, and it was the truth.
I followed her back down the stairs, watching the pattern of the way she walked so as not hit any of the creaky floorboards. When we got to the bottom of the stairs, she turned and looked at me. "Please take him for a second?" she asked.
This was different. Something was different here. Beaming with pride, I nodded. "If he'll take me," I said, extending my hands. "Hey, little buddy? Want to come see Uncle Jameson?"
"Da," Malcolm said and readily reached for me.
As I settled him on my hip, I watched the expressions flickering across Charlie's face, most of them unreadable but some of them so transparent I could tell exactly what she was thinking.
She liked this. She trusted me.
And what's more, I liked it and trusted myself.
As I folded his small body back into my arms, it felt like a hollow that had been scooped out of my body was being filled in again. Without even realizing, I bent to kiss his sweaty little forehead. "Hey there, little man," I said softly. "You get hungry in the middle of the night? Me too."
"Usually he likes cheese," Charlie said warmly. "Good for filling him up, you know, protein and fat. I'll go grab it."
"Oh yeah, cheese?" I cooed. I don't think I'd ever cooed in my life but it seemed the most natural thing in the world to coo at this heavy, floppy toddler in my arms. "You like your dairy products, do you, little man? They're yummy aren't they." I was starting to babble in that inane way all adults adopt when they talk to babies. Even though I was rarely around babies, it seemed to be some kind of instinctual thing.
Or maybe it was just around this baby. Her baby.
"You can bring him in here," Charlie called softly from the kitchen. I followed her voice and walked over to the other end of the small round kitchen table that sat jammed in the corner. She patted the high chair and I set him down reluctantly and stepped back, alarmed at how oddly empty my arms felt now felt. Needing to touch someone, I reached out to brush Charlie's arm and she smiled at me.
"You hungry too?" she asked.
I smi
led. "You think I need a snack in the middle of the night like a toddler?"
She shrugged. "Hell. I do it. No judgment here."
I thought for a second. "Yeah, gimme some of that cheese. Looks delicious."
She laughed and unpeeled a piece of string cheese for me - as if I couldn't do it myself - and handed it over.
I chomped down on it and rubbed my belly. "Mmm, toddler food."
Her eyes sparkled. "Something to drink?"
"Have any juice?"
"You want a juicebox?" She looked over at the high chair. "Malcolm might not want to share."
"I won't steal your juiceboxes, little man." I reached over and ruffled his hair. He gave me a serious look and shoved a wad of cheese in his mouth. "You're a funny little dude."
"He makes me laugh on a daily basis," she sighed. "I wish I could spend more time with him."
I suspected, but I had to know. "His dad is..?"
"Not a dad," she replied firmly.
I growled. I'd never really considered it, but all at once, the thought of not being in my child's life was incomprehensible to me. "You're it?" I asked in admiration.
She shrugged. "And my mom. Thank God I have her."
"That is lucky."
She turned. "You really are a big believer in luck aren't you?"
I pressed my lips together. Luck led me back to Reckless Falls. Luck kept me here, with her, when I was ready to leave. Luck sent me back here again after I'd thought the deal was already finished so I could be here in this kitchen with her and her son at two in the morning eating string cheese.